When it comes to dating, the ones who appear desperate or needy are the most unappealing. And there's actually a pretty simple explanation behind all this.
According to
Oliver Emberton, when someone is aloof with their affections, that's probably because they think they can do better. And when someone is desperate to be with you, chances are they think you’re better than they are.
And even if both parties are totally wrong, the reality is that humans are wired to interpret this as feedback on their own attractiveness. As Emberton further explains:
You can’t help being influenced by this, and it’s one reason why playing it cool is such an attractive trait, even if it’s such an easily contrived one. Being needy essentially says “you’re so much better than me, please pick me.” Not a great sales pitch.
Neediness is repulsive because we’ve evolved to recognize it as a bad signal. It’s like a fear of spiders or scorpions: a primal instinct which protects our best interests, even if we don’t understand why.
While this all might sound depressing and soulless, there is a way you can use this to your dating advantage. Read the
full article here