Do women really test men? What are these `tests` and how should you handle them?
Testing, testing, 1-2-3. That is what we
say into a microphone or tape recorder to make sure it works and it
hears us. Women are no different and often test us to see if "we work"
and if we are listening. Where these tests come from is from "their
history" and experience with men, and range in motive from playing with your mind to seeing if you have staying power.
So what you knew all along is true, that
women do test men, but not all women do it and with some women you will
"never" pass the test. So let us work backwards from the worst case
scenario. This would be the "chronic tester", the one who not only
tests you but tells you she has tested you and uses phrases like, "you
passed the test". Stay clear of these women, they are acidic and bitter
and the perfect example of someone who will never be satisfied because
she has been burned in the past and thinks all men are selfish pigs.
Some of us are selfish pigs, including myself, but not all of us. You
have only two choices with the "chronic tester", simple and sweet.
Unless of course you`re a spineless ass who thinks she is so hot it is worth losing your identity in an unfair relationship.
Choice #1: Two can play that game. Start
testing her or making her feel like it is a test. When you do this you
will also deliver a line that will really make her think. Use this
"I was kind of testing you to see how you
would react. A woman`s reactions are important to me because I am
really looking for something long term not just a fling."
Any time you mention long term commitment
to women; your tests should be fewer and farther between. Commitment is
what they seek and that is why they are testing you to begin with. Now
you can understand the game a little better to play it with them if
they are the habitual or chronic tester with no final exam in sight.
This is used only on someone you know you will not be with because of
their behavior. If by chance you convert the chronic tester, don`t
believe for a second she is cured. She is really not just a tester, she
is "the skeptic".
Choice #2: Dump the bitch! I don`t mean
blow her off and not call her back. I mean make up a story. If you have
had a few dates but not enough sex to warrant her testing skeptical
behavior, then teach her a lesson. Break up with her and make her feel
like she was clueless all along, but clueless that you were really
"that guy" and she could not recognize it. Something along the mindset
"Dating you made me realize what is wrong
with me and I need to be a better person before I could ever be ready
for you" or
"The way you test me has made me think about us a lot, I have come to
the conclusion I am probably not the guy for you, I am certain you are
not the girl for me, but I really wish you the best of luck"
Gentlemen, never forget the number one
rule of breaking up with "the wrong gal". Always, always have sex first
and then do the break up over phone. Skeptics are not worth an
Now we move on to the "repeat offender".
The repeat offender is the gal that only tests you in one area
repeatedly, that is with other women. Every part of your relationship
is cool but whenever a hot chick walks by she says, "Do you think she
is hot"? This is only a good situation if your girl is bisexual and
shares with you, otherwise your woman is jealous and insecure that she
might lose you to another gal.
The first question you have to ask
yourself in all these situations is, "Is she worth keeping?" If she is,
then buck up, suck up and roll with it homey. Learn to make her feel
more secure and have fun at the same time. If a girlfriend of mine was
constantly asking me if other women are hot, I would wonder if she
wanted to sleep with them herself and I would make a comment to that
effect. "I don`t think she is hot babe, but if you do I will buy both
of you a drink and give you some space." Or really make her feel good,
"Baby don`t point out any more women unless they are as hot as you"! Of
course, you know no girl will make that mark.
The truth is "life" is a big enough test.
We don`t need to be tested in our relationships as well. The intimate
relationships we share with others should be a "release" not a test. If
you are with someone who tests your loyalty or your honor or
commitment, then I would wonder what baggage they are bringing to the
table. These tests are far more common among women than men and are
derived from their past experiences with men who did not follow through
or keep their word. It has nothing to do with you.
You know who you are and what you`re
capable of. If you are looking for a one night stand, that is okay,
just don`t hit on commitment oriented gals looking for something else.
If you want to be a swinger that is okay too as long as you are farming
for potential mates in that arena. Play where you play best; where you
are comfortable and appreciated and not tested.
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