Do women really test men? What are these `tests` and how should you handle them?


Testing, testing, 1-2-3. That is what we say into a microphone or tape recorder to make sure it works and it hears us. Women are no different and often test us to see if "we work" and if we are listening. Where these tests come from is from "their history" and experience with men, and range in motive from playing with your mind to seeing if you have staying power.

So what you knew all along is true, that women do test men, but not all women do it and with some women you will "never" pass the test. So let us work backwards from the worst case scenario. This would be the "chronic tester", the one who not only tests you but tells you she has tested you and uses phrases like, "you passed the test". Stay clear of these women, they are acidic and bitter and the perfect example of someone who will never be satisfied because she has been burned in the past and thinks all men are selfish pigs. Some of us are selfish pigs, including myself, but not all of us. You have only two choices with the "chronic tester", simple and sweet.

Unless of course you`re a spineless ass who thinks she is so hot it is worth losing your identity in an unfair relationship.

Choice #1: Two can play that game. Start testing her or making her feel like it is a test. When you do this you will also deliver a line that will really make her think. Use this phrase:

"I was kind of testing you to see how you would react. A woman`s reactions are important to me because I am really looking for something long term not just a fling."

Any time you mention long term commitment to women; your tests should be fewer and farther between. Commitment is what they seek and that is why they are testing you to begin with. Now you can understand the game a little better to play it with them if they are the habitual or chronic tester with no final exam in sight. This is used only on someone you know you will not be with because of their behavior. If by chance you convert the chronic tester, don`t believe for a second she is cured. She is really not just a tester, she is "the skeptic".

Choice #2: Dump the bitch! I don`t mean blow her off and not call her back. I mean make up a story. If you have had a few dates but not enough sex to warrant her testing skeptical behavior, then teach her a lesson. Break up with her and make her feel like she was clueless all along, but clueless that you were really "that guy" and she could not recognize it. Something along the mindset of:

"Dating you made me realize what is wrong with me and I need to be a better person before I could ever be ready for you" or "The way you test me has made me think about us a lot, I have come to the conclusion I am probably not the guy for you, I am certain you are not the girl for me, but I really wish you the best of luck"

Gentlemen, never forget the number one rule of breaking up with "the wrong gal". Always, always have sex first and then do the break up over phone. Skeptics are not worth an "in-person" dismissal.

Now we move on to the "repeat offender". The repeat offender is the gal that only tests you in one area repeatedly, that is with other women. Every part of your relationship is cool but whenever a hot chick walks by she says, "Do you think she is hot"? This is only a good situation if your girl is bisexual and shares with you, otherwise your woman is jealous and insecure that she might lose you to another gal.

The first question you have to ask yourself in all these situations is, "Is she worth keeping?" If she is, then buck up, suck up and roll with it homey. Learn to make her feel more secure and have fun at the same time. If a girlfriend of mine was constantly asking me if other women are hot, I would wonder if she wanted to sleep with them herself and I would make a comment to that effect. "I don`t think she is hot babe, but if you do I will buy both of you a drink and give you some space." Or really make her feel good, "Baby don`t point out any more women unless they are as hot as you"! Of course, you know no girl will make that mark.

The truth is "life" is a big enough test. We don`t need to be tested in our relationships as well. The intimate relationships we share with others should be a "release" not a test. If you are with someone who tests your loyalty or your honor or commitment, then I would wonder what baggage they are bringing to the table. These tests are far more common among women than men and are derived from their past experiences with men who did not follow through or keep their word. It has nothing to do with you.

You know who you are and what you`re capable of. If you are looking for a one night stand, that is okay, just don`t hit on commitment oriented gals looking for something else. If you want to be a swinger that is okay too as long as you are farming for potential mates in that arena. Play where you play best; where you are comfortable and appreciated and not tested.


Source: JMorris