Can a person develop charisma, or is it something out of reach for anyone not born with it?

I`ve seen remarkable transformations in some of the people in my life, and others who seem to stay the same. For one example, if you`d have asked me 15 years ago if my cousin had charisma I`d have laughed in your face. Now, however, he`s become a very outgoing, socially conscious, extremely likeable person who I`d have to say is one of the most charismatic people I know. People are drawn to him now, whereas 15 years ago he was avoided by all except family. Did he learn it or he tap into an already inborn ability? He claims he learned it.

When a person, such as an actor, politician, or even a high-profile athlete starts a training program to develop charisma, often they may have to fake the traits that make them seem charismatic, until it comes naturally. Suddenly they are no longer faking it, and women are suddenly all over these men.

At the beginning, these guys don`t have `true charisma`... but they quickly learn how to `fake` charisma and the whole thing could be considered an act. Con artists can do this, and that`s where we get the term `confidence tricks`. And when men have to `fake` charisma out on the town meeting women, it works almost like magic at creating attraction. Men that work on developing charisma can become naturals, and suddenly are sleeping with, even marrying very beautiful, sometimes high-profile women.

Actors can `fake` charisma as well until it becomes natural, from Brad Pitt to George Clooney, and the list goes on. Tom Cruise, who played Maverick in Top Gun, was one of the most charismatic movie characters to ever come out of pop culture. He was extremely charismatic on the screen (sure, after careful training to seem charismatic), and yes in real life he was not as charismatic as his character.

Now, seducers and players can `fake` charisma as well to the point that it looks as though they`re naturals... Maybe they are and maybe they`re not. I think many of them have become naturals.

Does it matter though if they have true charisma or they have to `fake` it? Would you really feel bad if one night you used a few secrets that made you look and sound a lot more confident, and you always knew what to say and when to say it? And it drove every woman that you talked to wild with desire? When you watch these guys (and I`ve used these skills myself) they can literally use their charisma to attract women like nothing you`ve ever witnessed. Actually, maybe you have witnessed it. If actors are not as charismatic in real life, they sure do a great job of projecting it on the screen. Just look at Val Kilmer, Top Gun`s Iceman...

Charisma In The Nightclub

I know some guys that can do a better Iceman out in the nightclub, meaning these guys go into `mode` and blast the room with charismatic `skills` and get mad attention from choice women, for the sole purpose of meeting the hottest woman there and taking her home. They`re the ultimate PUA`s, but they`re not anything like the PUA`s you read about in Neil Strauss`s "The Game" for example. They don`t seem like PUA`s, and they have a hundred times more success. Why? Because women are just drawn to these guys. They`re not cocky/funny jackasses, if anything I`d describe them as super cool and super smooth. Sure they can be cocky. Sure they can be funny. But it`s all with charisma. It`s not the cocky/funny theory you may be reading about on `Internet Dating Guru` websites.

It`s all about the charisma. That will never change. So the longer men don`t learn it, the longer that men as a group ignore what charisma can do for them, the longer they`re going to go home empty handed at closing time.

PUA`s hit on women, trying to talk to fifty or so before they finally get one that will do the deed...

Guys with charisma don`t have to hit on women -- women hit on them. Women seduce them. Women want to fuck them.

If I`m a no-name Kevin Federline I really need to turn on the charisma if I`m going to attract a woman like Britney Spears, a pop icon with world wide fame and a massive fortune to match. You should read how she describes him. Britney Spears is captivated by Kevin Federline, and while the rest of the world talks smack about him, just remember he`s bagging one of the most popular female music performers ever.

And according to the media, she`s taking care of him... Paying his bills, buying him gifts, financing his rap album.

That`s charisma at work.

Kevin Federline is a walking Miller Beer commercial, he`s living the high-life. A single out-of-work father with no significant background -- an average looking guy in serious need of a haircut -- he went from living like My Name Is Earl to my name is Mr. Britney Spears. So, what`s his secret? Yes, you already know, like so many others before him, and this is straight from the mouth of Britney Spears herself; He knows how to use charisma on women.

In Summary:

# Anyone can learn charisma. That has been proven beyond a shadow of a doubt time and again. Don`t fool yourself into thinking you can`t learn it, or you can`t become more charismatic. You can.

# That person you know who seems `charismatic` -- well, he knows it too, and has made many mental notes (starting at a young age) as to what helps him project this image and he`s built on that (at the same time, he keeps his mouth shut about it, which is part of the charisma, and it`s called mystery)

# Someone who `trains` himself in charisma can easily become much more `charismatic` than someone who seems to take to it `naturally`. Why? Because the person training in it knows exactly what he / she is doing, and WHY. You can excel very rapidly in charisma when you follow a program. Just ask any con man, entertainer, politician, or ladies man.

# Charisma is very different than charm. Charm is sometimes an element of charisma, but does not have the powerful psychological properties of persuasion and influence that charisma has. In politics and business, you don`t call in the charmer to get things done. You call in the guy with the most charisma. Charm is middle-management. Charisma is the CEO.

# `Jerks` and `Nice Guys` can wield charisma to the same effect on women. I`m sure you`ve heard the old saying `Nice Guys` can`t get women, and yet you`ve seen `Nice Guys` that do get women. The Nice Guy vs. Jerk thing is a myth. Instead, think of it as the Charismas vs. No-Charismas. Nice guys and jerks can get women just as equally when each uses charisma.

# Women fantasize about men with charisma. Women will meet a charismatic man once and then day-dream about him for years. About love, passion, sex... control. But a man with charisma will never give women control... He`ll always keep a psychological distance, and remain the prize in the interaction.