Myths about sex are rife in our society. They occur because people pass off partial information as fact. Or, just as often, they have no information and invent sexual facts -- using their common sense or fantasy sense -- as they go along. It would be quite amusing if sexual satisfaction weren't at stake.
The facts get mixed up because ”experts” often change their minds or can’t actually agree, such as in the case of the female G-spot -- some experts still aren’t convinced and some of them are women. I will put to rest a few common misconceptions about sex that are due to their proximity to fact.
1- Period sex is safe sex Why we think this: The popular belief is that if you have sex during her period, she can’t get pregnant. This myth originated from the fact that a period "tells" her body, “Okay, you’re not pregnant, so let’s get rid of that egg and start again.” Logically, if the egg is out and the next one is far away, there is no egg to be impregnated by sperm.
The reality: Overall, this is a reasonable assumption to make, and in many cases, it works fine. When periods are regular and ovulation -- the release of the egg and the most fertile time of her cycle -- is predictable, it can be reasonably assumed that a woman cannot get pregnant at this time. The reason this myth is false is because sperm can survive in the vagina for up to seven days, and an egg can survive for three. If she has irregular periods and ovulates closer to her period, the egg and sperm transit times get crossed. In a normal 28-day cycle, ovulation occurs two weeks before the next period. So, unless you and your girl know her cycle very intimately, don’t play with fire -- you might just get burned.
2 - Withdrawal contraception works Why we think this: It is reasonable to assume that if no sperm is deposited in the female, she won’t get pregnant.
The reality: All men have some pre-ejaculate, which contains little live sperm that will quite happily wiggle their way up to the egg to fertilize it without too much trouble at all. This happens whether or not you pull out before you ejaculate. Ejaculating inside her will, of course, increase the chances of her becoming pregnant -- but any sperm is good sperm and her eggs won’t discriminate.
3 - Homosexual fantasies make me gay or bisexual The reason for such claim is because our society is still fairly homophobic. Because it is a reasonably new thing to have to deal with, it can be very confusing for men to have homosexual fantasies.
The reality: We all fantasize about different things at different times. Thinking about playing around with another man does not make you gay; it makes you curious. Acting on fantasies is different than just having them, and only you will know the real story. You will probably know if you are gay or not, but being bisexual or bi-curious can be far more intimidating to a strictly homosexual male in our society. Homosexual fantasies aren’t really talked about for fear of being labeled as gay, and that is not about to change anytime soon. If you are unsure of your sexual orientation, speak to a professional counselor or sex therapist.
4 - Penis size matters Why we think this: We think this because everyone always goes on about big penises and how great they are. A big tool is a sign of manliness; if you have one, you are undoubtedly the envy of any man with a penis that is even slightly smaller.
The reality: There is a medical condition known as micropenis. This condition would probably affect your penetrative performance, but very little else will.
Figuring out how to work your penis and the rest of your body to the best orgasmic advantage is something you should take the time to learn, and learn well. If you use different positions to make love, you have a greater chance of hitting the right spots. The clitoris, G-spot and entrance to the vagina are her hot spots, but don’t forget that some women don’t orgasm by penetration alone.
On the other hand, a really huge penis can be very painful for women because it hits the cervix. It takes time and effort for women to get used to making love to either a smaller penis or a large one. The best way to ensure her satisfaction is to get really good at other things, like oral sex and using your hands.
5- Women always need tons of foreplay Why we think this: Since the sexual revolution, men have been chastised for not giving their lovers enough warm-up time.
The reality: Sometimes, when having spontaneous sex, it is totally acceptable to just get right into it. Plus, some women need very little foreplay; just make sure you have one of these ladies before you go leaping on her without warning. Don’t get me wrong -- I am not suggesting you omit foreplay all the time. Some women just don’t want tons of foreplay all the time. No doubt they will let you know either way.
6- Women want multiple orgasms Why we think this: We can also blame this myth on the sexual revolution, which perpetuated the belief that sex is all about the satisfaction of women -- due to so many years of the opposite. In addition, we’ve come to believe that a man is more of man if he can give a woman more than one orgasm per session.
The reality: Just because women can have more than one orgasm doesn’t mean they want more than one. One is usually fine, two may be great, but any more than this is probably pushing the boundaries of wear and tear -- and boredom. Unless she really wants it and asks for more, after one or two, she probably feels kind of like you do after you finish -- the zing just sort of fizzles.
Brazilian designer Pedro Lourenco teamed up with Nike for a collaborative women's apparel for Fall/Winter 2014. Modeled by VS angel Karlie Kloss, you can check out the whole collection to hit NikeLab locations this November 13. Read more