"She take my money, When I’m in need, Yeah, she’s a triflin’ friend indeed." Kanye West and Jamie Foxx - Gold Digger
When rappers talk about an issue, you know the problem is pretty widespread. And if Kanye and Jamie have a problem with gold diggers, there's no reason for us not to address the issue. So let's face it: Men aren't exactly smart when it comes to gold digging women - Her delicious lips make it hard to tell if she's a gold digger or a sweet kitten with good taste.
Thing is, it’s not only rich guys who are victims. As long as you’ve got a job and a steady income, then you're an eligible dig too. So before you put your savings, properties, and dignity at stake, it is wise to analyze her.
Menknowpause has come up with handy manual to help you avoid (or get rid of) gold diggers. With any luck, this guide will allow you to bow out gracefully before these harpies plunge their well-manicured claws into your flesh.
Think with your Big Head, Not the Little One. Naturally, men are drawn to beautiful women. The hotter the woman, the more we take a leave of abscence from our 'common sense'. Most men will do anything when confronted by a pair of silky smooth legs in high heels and perky boobs that overshine her torso (or even her face). And while it's perfectly normal, it's also the classic beginning of a problem.
Gold-digging women know your soft spot very well, so they often dress the part. It’s up to you to fight your basic nature and avoid falling victim to the basics of gold digger traps.
Don't get us wrong; we're not beatiful-women-bashers. There’s nothing wrong with dating an attractive woman. We're telling you to think with your head before your penis begins convincing you to fuck fuck fuck, especially when you know that your bank account is more handsome than your face!
Compulsory Observation Observing a woman before you make your move is crucial. Does she only speak to men who appear to be financially sturdy? You know she's 'working' when she flits from man to man, looking to make her highest score. Of course, if you’re observing her in a posh restaurant or club, then it’s going to make things a bit harder. But remember do not come across as rude, strange, and freaky while performing your little observation.
You can definitely chat her up and examine her. Who says you can't have a good conversation with gold-digging women? But:
Watch Her Words If the conversation revolves around her gushing about a man’s job, income, car, and social status over and over again, you bet your money-shitting ass she's 70% gold digger 30% concerned-for-her-future career woman. Listen to her criticize the average men around you, who drive average cars and drink average drinks in their average clothes. Watch how she sneers at them while crossing her freshly shaven legs and lean in towards you so it looks as if both of you are an item. Probability: 100%. BINGO! Gold-digger alert. Make your exit, and walk far, far away, no matter how attractive she may be. Even if she might have been from a rich family and earns a whopping 5 figure monthly salary, that's rotten attitude.
Check Out Her Shoes and Bag: If the subject of career does come up, make sure you find out what she does for a living as this can provide you a clue or two. If she has an average, part-time or low-paying job but is struting Pradas and Manolos, you should be curious - VERY curious. People who don’t make much money probably shouldn’t be wearing designer shoes and handbags, unless they are trust-fund babies, squander their paychecks on expensive brands, or buy immitation goods. Bear in mind that there are knock-off products pretty much everywhere and some women can pull it off quite well. Unless you're pretty updated with fashion and women's style, you could easily mistake a girl who just wants to get in tune with fashion and society, for a gold digger. Then again, you may be dealing with a novice gold digger who has yet to hit the jackpot.
If the girl appears to be well-mannered, well-educated, and holds a steady job, she might just be looking for a man on the same level as her in terms of lifestyle, career, and ambition - this type, as far as we're concerned isn't a gold digger. It’s not incredible science, folks.
The eX-files You should be alarmed when such ex-boyfriend stories surface: hot older (like, wrinkly old) men, wealthy suitors, yachts, European holidays, and Louis Vuitton (Believe us, they worship LV. It's like.. their religion or something). Especially when she proclaims herself to be practically an international party girl.
No need to ditch her abruptly if she's sharing her bragging past to you. Just proceed with caution because a woman like this is probably looking to beefen up her impresive dating resume.
Send Out Your Spies If you have a sister or a close female friend, ask them to spy on the supposed gold-digger when she excuses herself for the ladies room with her pals. This will allow your spies access to eavesdrop while the subject freshens up. You might be able to get an idea of whether she likes you or your portfolio.You'll be surprised of how much info you can get when ladies congregate in the loo.
Quantified Sex If you only get laid when you buy her expensive stuff, then you’re getting screwed in more ways than one. This situation is tricky, with some men's reasoning that it's the way women express their love, and women argue that the gifting gestures are sweet and 'loving'. Oi! Get real! In this instance, we are letting ourselves become a huge gold mine for gold-sucking leeches. It will develop to a stage where the more you buy her, the more pleasure you’ll receive - and you'll start thinking if it's normal. The only way to thwart such schemes is to boot her out of your life. Women are smarter than you think. You can't just say "hey you money-sucking animal, are you with me for my money?" because she will say "of course not baby, I thought that's how you show me your love. I don't need your money" with a sad pity face. Secretly she's thinking dammit, what a close call! So be careful lads. Classy Girls Wear Gloves If your new girl doesn’t seem interested in making you wear a condom, she’s either irresponsible, a gold digger or both. The obvious strategy is that she’s trying to get pregnant, thus forcing you to pay child support (which she’ll probably spend on herself) for the next 18 years. Or she’s just an irresponsible twat with questionable health records. Sure, there are a lot of guys who would go bare-dicked for a heightened sensation, but it’s not worth dying over. This brings us to our first tip - use the head on your shoulers, not the one on your balls. Multiple Mobile Phones Unless she works as a personal assistant to a successful CEO or something like that, she shouldn't have more than one phone, especially when she seems to get a lot of calls which are unrelated to work.
Some gold diggers carry phones dedicated to different categories of men that she’s stringing along. You don’t want to end up being just another 'mobile phone' in her purse. If no sensible explanation for multiple phones are given to you, consider this a sign of disaster. Of Size & Shapes If you think all gold diggers are slim, tanned and have soft wavy hair, you're wrong! While many of them are pretty, that’s not always the case. Gold diggers come in all shape and sizes: fat, thin, 'exotic', althletic, short, round, pear, carrot-shaped, model-like, and totally hideous. We thought we should remind you in case you forgot.
Your Last Bullet: Pre-nup If you are already in a position where you can't live without her, but you can't shrug off the suspicion that your sweetheart will ditch you if she manages to dig her claws into a much wealthier man, then you should consider a prenuptial agreement before you journey into a loveless marriage with this money-minded.............. animal. Though it sounds like an insecure, stingy thing to do, this agreement will protect you from touching the lines of bankruptcy when your love story gets the cut.
With a pre-nup, both parties retain the money they came into the relationship with. Money earned after the marriage may still be divided, but you’ll get to keep everything you had prior to tying the knot. This is especially invaluable for men of wealth, as a divorce can financially cripple even the richest person. Just ask Steven Spielberg and he'll give you the same advice.
So there you have it - tips for men to avoid gold diggers. But most important of all use your impartial common sense when judging the cover of the she-book. Be careful when using these tips; women don’t take kindly to accusations of being gold diggers.
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