An Indoor Boyfriend can be used to describe a guy who is amazing to be with at home, but once you go out together to attend social events, it's a whole different thing altogether. He acts like a pain, annoys both you and your friends, is overtly intellectual, artsy, socially awkward, or damned theatrical for no good reason other than to get on your nerves. Your friends have no idea why you're still with him, and neither do you... until you both spend time alone at home and everything just seems perfect and awesome.



Think of this as a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde type of scenario, and here's how to know if your beau falls under the "Indoor Boyfriend" category:
  • Have you ever uttered the phrase "He's a real sweetheart once you get to know him"?
  • Do you and your boyfriend regularly get into really stupid fights on the way to social outings and end up just turning around and going home, where you watch TV and apologize to each other?
  • Have you ever thought things would be perfect if only you never had to interact with one each other's family/co-workers/friends?
  • Have you ever found yourself lying about your boyfriend's interests / aspirations / crazy talk in order to save yourself embarrassment? For example: "Of course he doesn't think the police are 'puppets of the oil companies.' He was just kidding!"
  • Do you avoid bringing your boyfriend to parties because it would stress you out too much?
  • Do you spend hours griping to friends about how you have to break up with this guy ASAP, only to go home to a lovely evening of "Mad Men" and Thai food and cuddling?
  • Have you ever convinced yourself that you are just being shallow about your boyfriend's lack of social skills / bizarre behavior / obnoxiousness, insisting that if you love each other, that's all that matters?
If anything or all of the above sounds more than familiar, then you have an Indoor Boyfriend on your hands/in your bed. Fear not though, there's nothing wrong per se. It's just that sometimes viewing your man through someone else's eyes can make you reevaluate everything. But if the guy simply doesn't have the ability to socialize like an adult without putting people off, then you might want to rethink your relationship unless you don't mind becoming a social pariah yourself.

via Lemondrop