It is sick to think that Melissa Huckaby had sexualy abused and murdered an 8-year-old Sandra Cantu. The Sunday school teacher, and a mother herself, allegedly used a foreign object to rape the little girl. We ask, why and how on earth can a woman, a MOTHER do this to a little girl - her daughter's playmate? It's beyond humane, beyond evil. The only reason we can "safely" conclude is the woman must be insane.
However, writer Deborah King explains the latter, which along with other experts, doubt if Huckaby is insane. She relates through her personal experience and dealings with many other abused women, that "rape with a foreign object is not as unusual as one would like to think."
She explains that sexual molestation is more about feeling powerful, rather than just fulfilling sexual urges.
Rape, with or without a foreign object, is an act that disempowers the
victim so the rapist can somehow reclaim the power/integrity that was
stolen from them at some previous time. The rapist may not remember the
physical, emotional and/or sexual abuse he or she suffered as a child.
It may be buried deep in the psyche. The person never deals with the
trauma, never clears the deep shame and humiliation and fear that were
the legacy of the abuse, and so may be at risk to repeat the behavior
When you grow up and have a family of your own, having buried all these past feelings deep inside, someday you might be aggravated when your child (or your neighbour's child, in Huckaby's case) reaches the age you were when you were abused. These feelings, unleashed, can spin out of control, causing you to act on these inclinations.
Sexual predators who target young children are often trying, in their
own twisted way, to get back the innocence that was stolen from them.
They are attracted to the child's light, the child's goodness -- the
light and goodness they wish they still had. They are often mirroring
their own childhood, trying in a sick way to heal what was done to them.
King had also been sexualy abused by her own father for a long time when she was young. He had used objects like a hairbrush or glass coke bottle for penetration. She spent a long time wiping out the burden of the memory from her mind. She then entered the health and wellness field, helping others who had been abused, being non-judgemental about their situations.
She states, that in Melissa Huckaby's case, that she is most likely not insane as "She went through very sane actions to hide what she had done --
stuffing the dead child in a suitcase, dumping the suitcase in a pond,
writing a note, lying to investigators and journalists. These actions
make an insanity plea less likely to succeed."
When we’re not working and don’t have any appointments to attend, this is called ‘spare time’. Some people feel as if they don’t get any of it, but remember; you get the same amount of hours in the day as Beyonce. She has a husband, a toddler, and a career as an international superstar. If she can take care of all her business, you can take care of yours. Read more