You're a stylish girl with amazing qualities: boobs, ass, a killer pout.. and you might even be a nice person too. Everyone at work likes you, and you do your job well. What an amazing career woman you're shaping up to be!
But one day after a few post-work drinks, a male colleague you usually have lunch with grabs your hand, looks into your eyes and pulls you in. He is going to say something, or worse, is he going to kiss you?! What the fuck is he doing?? You retract your hand, and your unfortunate facial reaction becomes the answer to your awkward situation. You had no intention of dating or sleeping with this person, but he didn't seem to realize that.
An employee education and training service used by tech companies like Google, Groupon, Ask.com, and Eventbrite recently broached the subject in an article called "What if a male colleague gets the wrong idea? (it has since been taken down)" which doesn't tell women how to tell the men to back off, instead makes it out to be the ladies' fault.
Bbbut it's not our fault!
The article pretty much blames women for the way men think and act at work. Here's one advice:
If you act the same way — always professional, but also always like yourself — around everyone, the problematic colleague will be less likely to get the idea that you’re coming on to him. One caveat: If you’re touchy-feely or flirtatious by nature, you might want to dial it back around him and any guys from whom you sense discomfort.
What about women who have no idea they are flirty by nature? What if they were just being themselves? The answer is grandma.
Don’t say or do anything you wouldn’t say or do in the presence of your
grandmother. If you sense that you could start unconsciously flirting
(you’re human, and sometimes it happens), imagine that your grandmother
is in the room. If you’d feel embarrassed saying or doing whatever
you’re about to say or do in front of Grandma, don’t go there.
But wait! Grandma might not be enough to fend men off, because of your slutty dressing and slutty way of speaking!
In a perfect world, women would feel free to dress however they want without being stigmatized for it. But know that revealing clothing and certain verbal tics, such as ending statements with an upward inflection in your voice or struggling to accept a compliment, can affect others’ ability to take you seriously.
Once you've learned how to speak in monotone, behave like a nun, dress and look like a dowdy librarian, you will successfully not lead male colleagues on. More importantly, it's about time these training programs coach men on how to keep their dicks in their pants and realize that the girls at work really aren't leading them on.
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