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A columnist for the Times Online was faced with a "Do I need a Brazilian waxing?" question

Question: I recently separated from my husband after 13 years of marriage and have started seeing a 27-year-old I met at the gym (I’m 38). We recently had sex for the first time and he was shocked by what he saw as my lack of grooming. I do look after myself (hence the gym) but I don’t think that a permanent tan and Brazilian wax should be deal-breakers in a relationship. Or am I just hopelessly outdated?

Her answer (or, the gist of it) was:

Though the feminist ethos of your “take me as I am” argument is perfectly valid, your boyfriend’s reaction is instinctive — and in the face of something that is honestly perceived as a turn-off by one partner, rational arguments simply do not work. The good news is that, as “issues” go, this is a pretty small one and, hey, if the relationship doesn’t work out you can return to your old ways.

The bad news is that shaving sensitive areas is problematic — you are likely to leave a lot of razor bumps and create ingrown hairs, which can be very nasty. The most popular solution, waxing, is a uniquely painful experience. Imagine burning-hot, extra-strength Sellotape being ripped from delicate skin ... and now treble the pain. Sadly, high-tech alternatives are not pain-free either. According to the nice lady I spoke to at the New York Laser Clinic (thenewyorklaserclinic.co.uk), laser hair-removal doesn’t hurt “that much” and feels more like being “pinched”. You’ll need up to six sessions, which would cost £474, and the success rate is determined by the level of contrast between the colour of your hair and the colour of your skin.

Fortunately, the craze for Brazilians is abating. The hot new haircut is the Sicilian. It is like a Brazilian, but you are left with a neat little Sicily-shaped triangle, which at least means that you still look like a woman. Good luck.

As women who are naturally packaged with the mighty bush down south, it may seem unnatural to have it all off like that of an 8 year old child. But porn with clean pussies are abundant, and more women are enjoying the attention they get from their partners after a wax. Most men have since been programmed to find a clean plate for their sexual appetite, and if yours isn't clean, it isn't sexy.

The only thing I'm thinking of is, what would happen if the bar was equalized for men; that they too should keep their low zone hairless for the sexual joy ride? If women are really conscious about their pubic appearance, why shouldn't men be equally concerned about their pubic identity?


More of the advice at the Times Online